When you want something, you want it.
You’re persistent and determined. You’re in it for the long haul.
You don’t give up or quit easily.
It’s a blessing, right?
It can be—when you’re using it as fuel to create more of what you want.
Willpower is tricky because it keeps you in the game, but it makes it difficult to see when you’re playing for the other team. Just like willpower is the magic that conjures what you intend to create, it can be the bars that hold you back.
Maybe you’re pinning all of your hopes and dreams onto a specific outcome that’s not in the cards for you.
Maybe you’re feeding patterns that are taking you away from the experience you want to have.
Maybe you’re pouring energy into avoiding confronting your fear.
Even when it’s in your best interest to pivot or quit, you continue to hold on and as a result, you can spend years of your life, hitting your head against a wall, waiting and hoping for something to change. Sometimes, you can spend years of your life, thinking you’re moving forward, when really, you’re just standing still.
How can the same energy that moves mountains and creates miracles, also create misery, complacency, and struggle?
When you have willpower, you have the ability to withstand an immense amount of discomfort. It takes A LOT for you to change.
It’s something that’s gotten in my way many times, and it gets in my people’s way too. In fact, it’s one of the key things that holds us back from creating what we actually want. We ARE commitment, but our commitment becomes misguided and misdirected, so while it looks like we’re making progress, we’re actually just keeping busy. We trick ourselves into thinking we’re moving forward.
Here are some of the ways this can show up:
→ You insert additional steps before taking the plunge and going for it. For example: You invest more time/energy/money into your training before you start charging for your work.
→ You go wide, rather than deep. For example: You bounce around from strategy to strategy, without taking the time to master anything.
→ You create more success in your life {more of what you want}, without shifting the experience you’re having in your life {more of what you don’t want}. For example: Your income increases, but you still experience lack, stress, chaos, and frustration.
→ You focus on what is needed and what you know, without stepping outside of what’s comfortable to do what is required. For example: You try to fix a bad situation with obvious solutions, but you don’t do the work to reinvent yourself in the process.
So if you’re finding that you’re getting more of the same, despite your will, determination, and persistence, it may be helpful to reflect/reevaluate how you’re using this gift you were given.
Are you directing your willpower against change? Or for it?
Are you using your willpower to avoid confronting your fear? Or are you boldly and bravely taking action regardless?
With 2019 around the corner, it’s a powerful time to check in with yourself, what you want, and whether or not your persistence is paying off.
With love & awareness,
-Kayla
P.S. If this feels like YOU and you’d like support to dive deeper into what’s holding you back from creating what you want in your life {and how to move beyond it}, reach out at kaylamacarthurcoaching@gmail.com and let’s have a conversation.
Words & Wisdom
Enter your information below to receive Kayla’s blog posts.
